Why Friendships Are Just as Important as Romantic Relationships for Your Mental Health
When people think about emotional well-being, romantic relationships tend to get most of the attention. We’re often asked if we’re dating, married, or “seeing someone,” as though partnership is the primary marker of connection and fulfillment.
But research tells a more nuanced story: friendships are just as essential to mental health as romantic relationships — and in some cases, even more protective.
As a therapist in Frisco, I often work with adults who feel pressure to prioritize romance while unintentionally neglecting friendships that are deeply sustaining. Let’s look at what the research actually says.
What the Research Says About Friendships and Mental Health
Strong social relationships are consistently linked to:
Lower levels of depression and anxiety
Greater life satisfaction
Increased resilience during stress
Better physical health outcomes
According to the Mayo Clinic, adults with meaningful friendships experience reduced stress, improved self-confidence, and stronger coping abilities. Social connection acts as a buffer against life’s inevitable hardships.
Large cross-cultural research published in Frontiers in Psychology found that valuing friendships is strongly associated with greater happiness and better overall health, particularly in older adulthood. In other words, friendships are not secondary relationships — they are foundational to well-being.
Bella DePaulo’s Work on Friendship and Single Living
Social psychologist Bella DePaulo has spent decades studying single life, social bonds, and the ways society tends to overemphasize romantic relationships.
In her book Single Out, DePaulo challenges the cultural narrative that romantic partnership is the central path to happiness. Her research highlights that people who cultivate strong friendships often experience deep fulfillment, purpose, and psychological health — whether or not they are romantically partnered.
In her writing for Psychology Today, DePaulo discusses evidence suggesting that developing and maintaining close friendships can be more consistently protective against depression than entering a romantic relationship. Romantic relationships can certainly enhance well-being, but they can also introduce stress, instability, or loss. Friendships, especially long-term ones, often provide steadier emotional support across life stages.
Why Friendships Are So Powerful
Friendships offer unique psychological benefits:
1. Chosen Connection
Unlike family ties, friendships are voluntary. Mutual choice strengthens feelings of belonging and validation.
2. Distributed Emotional Support
Relying on one romantic partner for all emotional needs can create strain. Friendships allow support to be shared across multiple relationships, increasing resilience.
3. Identity Beyond Romance
Friendships reinforce parts of your identity that exist outside of partnership — your interests, humor, history, and growth.
4. Stability Across Life Transitions
Romantic relationships may change through breakups, divorce, or relocation. Long-standing friendships often provide continuity during those transitions.
Quality Matters More Than Quantity
Research consistently shows that the quality of friendships — trust, emotional safety, reciprocity — matters more than the number of friends you have. One or two deeply supportive relationships can have a profound impact on mental health.
If you’re partnered, investing in friendships strengthens your overall support system.
If you’re single, friendships are not a consolation prize — they are a powerful, central source of meaning and connection.
When Friendships Feel Hard
Adulthood can make maintaining friendships challenging. Careers, parenting, relocation, burnout, and emotional exhaustion can all shrink social circles. Many high-achieving professionals I work with realize they’ve unintentionally deprioritized friendships while focusing on work or romantic goals.
If you’re feeling lonely, disconnected, or unsure how to build stronger relationships, therapy can help you:
Identify patterns that make connection difficult
Strengthen vulnerability and communication skills
Process friendship loss or transitions
Create space for deeper, healthier bonds
You Deserve a Full, Connected Life
Romantic love can be meaningful. But it is not the only — or even the primary — path to emotional wellness. Friendships are powerful, protective, and deeply human.
If you’re looking for a therapist in Frisco who understands the psychology of connection — not just romance — I would love to support you.
I offer a free 15-minute consultation where we can talk about what’s feeling stuck and how therapy might help you build stronger, more fulfilling relationships.
Reach out today to schedule your consultation. You don’t have to navigate this alone.
References
DePaulo, B. (2023). Single Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After.
DePaulo, B. (various articles). Psychology Today – Living Single blog.
Helliwell, J. F., & Putnam, R. D. (2004/2020 updates). The social context of well-being. Frontiers in Psychology.
Mayo Clinic Staff. (2023). Friendship: Enrich your life and improve your health. MayoClinic.org.